Short get away.

Like the title said, going off to Taiwan in less then 6 hours now! (: A short walk away from the sadness, stressful world and troubles for now! I'm sure to eat alot to get fatter before returning to Singapore(: I'll be back on the 22nd March. Though I don know if there's any readers at all but it's for me to at least keep track for my life through next time(: I am very determine to start a new chapter of my life. Start a new and forget the past. Although I'm unsure if I could, I can only have faith that as time passes, things would be better. However I guess, if there's another opportunity... If I were to try it again, I'm dumb. But I think I'll be the dumb one to try it again. Oh well, the future will determine itself. I'm too lazy to care anymore. Anyway, hope I'll have lots and lots of fun! ^^ bye peeps! Anything contact me through whatsapp! Don't message and call me! (: goodnight!

Updates~

It's been long since I blog I guess.
I'm done with my enrolment matters for now. I'm glad to do it together with Shadame! (: It's quite tiring recently as I'm sleeping late due to afternoon naps and ending work late. Heard some bad news that some people are in the same school as me again... Haiz, kind of disappointing. Oh well, guess I won't be so ' lucky' to see them and I hope not! Looking forward to the start of poly and I hope that I can cope with the life there. Glad that my school and Shadame's is so near! It's only beside one another!! :D looking forward to what's planned for me ahead and experiencing new things(: that's all for school and stuff.

Well, somehow recently the feeling came back again. Had a long chat with Shadame and it's nice! Glad to have such a nice friend around and I'm glad that I met her ever since the first day of my secondary school life. Epic incident that made us friends though. XD I'll never forget that day! I just hope that things will get normal again between someone and I. I just hope to end everything ASAP before my trip to Taiwan on the 17th April. However, I doubt that it's possible since that person is dragging it. I'm getting very exhausted. All I hope is that we could still be friends. If its possible, I hope that at least we can be like before, whereby we could pour out problems to one another and back to being best friends if there's no chance of repairing that relation of ours. There's work tomorrow and I don't feel like going... :( afternoon shift on a Friday and Saturday? It seriously sucks. Both days I can't enjoy at all. More of like I'm getting bored and tired which makes me reluctant to go work. I just feel like getting a long long break from everything. I just wish that when school starts, I'm freshed up to accept every challenge ahead of me and I don't think so deeply into things any more. Maybe sometimes, looking situation at superficial level makes life simpler and easier. Definitely  happier I guess. Anyway, shall get gifts for all my friends from Taiwan! (; I just hope I don't lose contact with them! Well, they are the ones that helped me through many difficult times during my secondary school life and I'm glad to know and have them in my life! (: Well, time to sleep now!
Goodnight! ^^

I don't know how much longer I can take it. The thought of it scares me and my heart aches hearing those kind of news. I'm scared that what they said was true. I can't help thinking of all sorts of possibilities. I don't know what to do anymore. It seems like I still can't take it. All I can do is wish and hope that it's not like how others told me about. It feels hopeless. I hate it this way.

我的心里一直都有个疑问。人都会有感觉，自己不想被伤害但是却伤害别人。为什么人会那么忍心去伤害一个自己曾经所深爱过的人。付出那么多的感情难道就会完全变得不存在了吗? 如果真是这样，为什么当时要选择开始爱对方? 如果长久的感情可以一瞬间，一天内化为乌有，那么整个相爱的过程还拥有它的意义吗? 那么，起初为什么要多此一举，花那么多心思让对方爱上你? 我不明白这么做的意义。。

Yay! I'm so happy that I got into the course I wanted ever since secondary 3. It's a target and a dream I shared with someone. I hope that he got something he like and will excel too(: all the best to all!

我不知道你会不会，有没有读我的部落格但是如果你有，我只想告诉你我很抱歉。对不起因为当时的我感到很没有安全感、乱发脾气、伤害了你，让你伤心而忽略了你，完全没体会你的感受和困境。如果再有一次的机会，我一定会弥补而且会做的更好。决定权在你的手里。我只希望是个好结果因为我还是爱着你的... 如果你有读的话，去看看只属于我们两个的部落格再做决定吧。我只希望你会想清楚自己心里要的不要再管别人说什么或给我们的眼神。因为这是我们之间的事，与他们无关。如果你愿意，我只想告诉你要进去的密码和以前的一样。我没改到。 你还是可以用你的任何一个电邮户口进去。☻我只能希望是最好的。 对不起我没有把我心里的真真的想法、真相和感觉告诉你因为当时的我放不下面子。对不起... ☹ ♡

Looking forward to thursday! ~

I can't wait for Thursday  Finally it's mummy's off day and.... She PROMISED me to help me dye my hair! :D Waited so long to try. Guess it's once in a life time? Just trying out for experience and experiment:b Hope that it turns out well although first time, the colour may turn out to be quite dark. :x However, I guess that there's no harm trying right? haha. Cough still hasn't go away yet.. How I wish it disappear soon! It's killing me and being sick caused me to lose weight again! :( There's work later:x got to prepare soon and maybe have lunch with Michelle? :b Yeap! She has the same name as me. hahaha! Update soon!

我累了

我感到很累了。自己明知道有些不可能但还是依然抱着那丝希望。不管自己伤痕累累，依然坚持下去。是不是只要做错，选错无论把自己变得多好，怎么改变都不值得多一次的机会？就算如此，可以不可以给我一个确定的答案？要就是要，不要就是不要。反正自己已经被伤害，自己知道下场如何还是不听被人说的就是为了要得到真正的答案。为什么要一直拖下去呢？不如就一次过翻出来说，说完就结束了。不要在假装关心，不要再做出一些会让人误会的举动。快快了事比起拖泥带水还来得好。这样不会浪费彼此的时间，不会再让彼此受到更大的伤害。为什么一直要给一个不确定的答案？喜欢就是喜欢。任何事都可以想办法解决。更何况，对方都说了无所谓为什么要那么自私的伤害对方？做出一方面的决定让对方和你承受那么痛苦的后果。自己觉得对对方好的不一定是最好的。我不许要你这么伟大，我只许要你在我身边和我度过每一个困难。对。爱一个人是要他/她幸福快乐。可是如果他所谓的“幸福快乐” 是装出来的呢？如果他并不是真的快乐呢？说好无论发生什么事都会在彼此得身边，会一起努力，不会伤害对方，让彼此伤心难过。可是现在的我们呢？就算还爱着对方都不能够说出口，不能让彼此知道。。有没有谁可以告诉我除了放弃还有什么办法？因为，我不会也不想放弃。不管自己感到多伤心，难过或是自己受到多大的伤害我依然选者相信你还是对我有感情的。可能这样的我，每个人都会觉得我很傻但是，我不管。因为，我觉得你是值得的。就像以前你觉得我是值得的。

No voice day! :(

Well, just a short post before I sleep!

As stated above, it's a ' No Voice Day' for me. Hardly can hear my own voice in the morning. It gets better in the afternoon but sometimes my voice just went missing.. Yes, gone! This is the worst flu I've ever gotten in my 17 years of life! Well, people laughed at my voice. :( especially Sean! Oh well, he better hope he doesn't experience this situation in the future! Had an advance revenge by freaking him out the day before. Well, so sorry to make him wait for nearly 1 1/2 hours just because I fell asleep while waiting for time to past. Bad luck for him that I forgot to off my phone's silent mode. Haha. Work yesterday was alright. Busier than usual and I'm kinda working alone. :x ATL is busy and usually he just helped me to collect the cards and take over my place when I'm having break. Haha, oh well! But it's fun working with them! (: well, officer ask me to work OT tomorrow. So funny! He just wants me to wok OT when it's his shift, haha, well got to sleep now or else I think I'll be in zombie mode tomorrow! Nights! (:

Today is a saturday, haha! My off day today. Hmm, planning to switch my off day next week to Friday to attend my sister's graduation ceremony. Release of O level's result's date is nearing. Haiz, hope that worse come to worse, I could get an average result at least.. :x Of course, I hope that I could get a good result to enter my long wished course. haha. Hmm, haven't packed my notes for Yong Bin. Gosh, I'm so lazy to even touch it. What a mountain of papers! :/ Well, stayed at home the whole day. Feels so nice hugging my baby reindeer. I miss the person who gave it to me alot. But there's nothing I can do though. haiz. I just miss the times we're happy together. The saddest thing is that you can be normal to even someone you were very angry with but not me. Even if I knew that there's little chance but I don't want to give up because I can't do it. I've tried... All I want is just to be with you happily. Just a simple life together with you each and everyday without worries like how we've started and not like this.. I bet that person won't know anything as I doubt he'll see this. If he would, he would have seen my post in our blog. :/

* Never judge a person by its cover. She may look happy outside but in actual fact, she's crying every night and bleeding inside every single time. *

It's Friday(:

Well, work today is fun as usual. I was late for 5 minutes.. :x just becuase of breakfast. ohh well.. Guess I shall just go work alone and not meet KY anymore.. Somehow, I feel that sometimes I can't communicate very well with her.. I just don't understand the way she thinks. Oh well! Anyway, my assistant team leader is always so nice towards me! (: haha, he always let me go back home earlier than I should. Guess, I just love this job more than ever! Lunch at staff canteen today. Well, I got discount for the food :b MacDonalds is expensive.. :x Plus, I had it for the past few days. Eek... should stop eating Mac for awhile! Went to meet Wei Qiang after work to get my USS ticket. Walk aimlessly around Tampines for while and get Yami yogurt. Trained back and walked home. Suddenly, I just feel like meeting someone. I guess, no one will understands how it feels like. Oh well... Anyway, met Sean and the others to have dinner together. Ended up eating at 9 plus 10... Hungry like crazy. haha. Almost watch a midnight movie with them but end up going back to home to dance with Sister and Kelvin. haha, had a fun time. well, I should sleep earlier nowadays. Lack of sleep.. :x